Spiderman's Semen Killed Mary Jane!

[elfs]

From Spider Man: Reign #3:

Oh God, I'm sorry! The doctors didn't understand how it happened! How you had been poisoned by radioactivity! How your body slowly became riddled with cancer! I did. I was... I am filled with radioactive blood. And not just blood. Every fluid. Touching me... loving me... Loving me killed you!"

Sadly, this is not a joke.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Top Five Reasons Deadly-Radioactive Spiderman Is a Good Idea

. Spiderman's radioactive glow an excuse to use more special effects in movies in place of bothersome plot and characterization.

. Full-strength radioactive contamination harmless to Peter Parker, but diluted kills Mary Jane -- proof of homeopathy!

. Doc Oc threatens to blow up Spiderman to shower entire Eastern U.S. with dangerous radioactivity, manipulate real estate market.

. Spiderman required by law to use special non-flush lead-shielded toilets.

. Coming crossover series with "dark hero" Dr. Strangelove: "Precious Bodily Fluids".

. Peter Parker's secret identity publicly revealed by Geiger Counter, ending stupidest version of Spiderman ever.

[spiralsong.livejournal.com]

Coming crossover series with "dark hero" Dr. Strangelove: "Precious Bodily Fluids".

*snrk*!!!