The Toilet of the Future!

[elfs]

Toilets of the Future!

Yesterday, I blogged about going to the Great Wall Mall, a place that so's over-the-top all-Asian all-the-time that you'd swear it was camp and not kitsch, but no, they're earnest about it, and it's kitsch. And one of the weirdest things there was a store, and the woman who ran the store, selling one item only: The Toilet From The Future. Or at least, a cheesy SFnal future.

The Lotus Toilet washes your ass for you. When you're done with your business, you push a button and an arm comes out and lovingly hoses down your backside, then dries you with a gentle stream of warm air. This poor woman in the photograph gives demos of this thing all day, showing off one with a plastic shield so the customer doesn't get sprayed, but gets the idea. Those seats to the left of the photograph are an accessory: they change color in response to your body temperature, so you'll know if someone has sat on the seat before you. Apparently, being made aware of someone else's body heat is "icky" to some people.

Look at the list of accessories! "Rear wash," "Feminine wash," "Heated seat"... "Remote control‽‽‽"

I first read about these when Jay Lake went to Worldcon Japan last September, but he was safely in Tokyo when he encountered the robotoilet but now (cue Drew Barrymore) they're here! How weird. I'd hate to be sitting on one of these babies when Skynet wakes up. I don't think I'll be investing in one anytime soon. Whatever happened to the good old-fashioned bidet?

Comments

[solarbird]

I actually kind of miss these. They do other smart things like change how much water they use each cycle depending upon whether someone sat down or stood.

[urox.livejournal.com]

Ditto. You don't realize how much you miss sitting on a pre-warmed seat until you get back to states-side and sit down on a cold one.