An Orgy Declined
Mar. 10th, 2004 09:00 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elfs This saturday at an undisclosed location (although no place Dick Cheney would ever visit) there's an orgy going on. It's an all-male handballing (fist fucking, whatever you want to call it) event. I've been to a number of these over the years and always had a good time. I'm not going to go into the physical and spiritual joys of handballing; suffice it to say that it's like any other extreme support-- incredibly pleasurable to those who enjoy it, eminently survivable when done correctly, and completely incomprehensible to those not interested in it.
Despite having been actively invited to the next one (I suspect it's mostly an automated email list, so it's not like someone thought of me or anything) I have decided to politely decline.
I'm not sure why. Part of it might be that I'm getting older, but I think that's unfair. Most of the men who go to the Red Hankercheif Parties (as they are called; wearing a red handkerchief was a signal that you were into fisting, once upon a time) are older than I am. Part of it might be the pressure of life-- I want my weekend to relax and catch up, and heading out to a party is a dent of time I don't want to give up. Part of it is Yamaarashi-chan's surgery tomorrow; I want to be available if complications arise over the weekend.
It's funny, though, because I've been jonesing for a boyfriend for a bit, which happens every spring. There's a bit of greed involved with that because I have Omaha, one steady friend-with-benefits (what a silly phrase), two others who are "when we can make time in our ridiculously busy lives, which is like once a year if we're lucky", and one friend with whom I'm undergoing delicate negotiations... but they're all women.
I think it's just stress, though (the declining, not the wanting, although even that is tinged with the passivity of I'll-get-to-that-eventually). Life is full, overflowing, even when one big chunk, my writing, is on hold.
Note to self: get the damn bicycle fixed.
Despite having been actively invited to the next one (I suspect it's mostly an automated email list, so it's not like someone thought of me or anything) I have decided to politely decline.
I'm not sure why. Part of it might be that I'm getting older, but I think that's unfair. Most of the men who go to the Red Hankercheif Parties (as they are called; wearing a red handkerchief was a signal that you were into fisting, once upon a time) are older than I am. Part of it might be the pressure of life-- I want my weekend to relax and catch up, and heading out to a party is a dent of time I don't want to give up. Part of it is Yamaarashi-chan's surgery tomorrow; I want to be available if complications arise over the weekend.
It's funny, though, because I've been jonesing for a boyfriend for a bit, which happens every spring. There's a bit of greed involved with that because I have Omaha, one steady friend-with-benefits (what a silly phrase), two others who are "when we can make time in our ridiculously busy lives, which is like once a year if we're lucky", and one friend with whom I'm undergoing delicate negotiations... but they're all women.
I think it's just stress, though (the declining, not the wanting, although even that is tinged with the passivity of I'll-get-to-that-eventually). Life is full, overflowing, even when one big chunk, my writing, is on hold.
Note to self: get the damn bicycle fixed.
no subject
Date: 2004-03-10 01:26 pm (UTC)And, of course, I have the wrong plumbing to receive it...
no subject
Date: 2004-03-10 01:42 pm (UTC)Wow.
Ya know, among lesbians, you'd be "well hung".
A. Wench
(You walked into it, pal.)
no subject
Date: 2004-03-10 06:26 pm (UTC)