Corporate Necrophilia Continues...

Freshly sated from raping the corpse of Winnie The Pooh yet still uneasily dissatisfied, some git at the Walt Disney Corporation leaned back against his couch, lit up a doobie and turned on The Blue Lagoon. After the second roach burned his fingers, he freeze-frames the scene where the ten-year-old Richard climbs back into the boat with nothing but a pair of thin, wet cotton shorts clinging to his buttcheeks. One hand inside his boxers, he decided on his next victim: Tinkerbell needs a makeover and would look much better as a boyish clone of Peter Pan.

Tinkerbell does not need a goddamned makeover.

And no, USA-fucking-Today, this in not a "cool new look." This is an abuse of an entire generation's childhood memories.

Massive Fail, Microsoft Bing Edition

Bing Fail

I guess Bing attempts to build its home page programmatically, from images found on the web one way or another. Either that, or someone really snuck one in, because in this screenshot I caught this afternoon, the Columbus Day collage includes a picture of Columbus saying, "Which one of ya'll Indian bitches wants to suck my Pinta?" [sic]

They used to make real women, didn't they?

Wow, talk about clueless. Karl Lagerfeld, some famous fashion designer, yesterday said of those who criticize his excessively thin models,

These are fat mummies who sit with bags of potato chips in front of the television saying that thin models are ugly. Fashion is all about dreams and illusions. Nobody wants to see a round woman.

Yo, Karl, these are real women: Playboy centerfolds, 1953 through 2008. Well, okay, up until about 1994 or so. Then the cyborgs took over.