I'm done with my procedure.

So, the day of my esophagogastroduodenoscopy^[?], I get home to find that the weather has finally turned beautiful. And I think to myself, "I should go get those tomato plants!" I consult with my aftercare sheet. [X] Do not drive

Damn! The lawn needs mowing. [X] Do not operate heavy or complex machinery.

Grr. Can I at least masturbate? [X] Do not operate heavy or complex machinery.

Todays Brain is brought to you by fentanyl!

Obama's Certificate of Live Birth Found

( From NRO, no less. )

FOX refers to Michelle Obama as "Barack's Baby Mama."

( 'Poor Judgement' my left buttock )

Lou Dobbs to run for Governor of NJ?

( The stupident man alive! )

President Bush insists everyone else play golf instead.

( Fore! )

Louisiana to indemnify teachers who "teach all sides."

( More... )

Clownhall: "Who is Barack Obama? Democrat or Dictator?"

( Someone doesn't watch the news much... )

TSIB: The Founding Fathers Advocated Intelligent Design

( WTF, Over? )