I'm totally dressing as a pirate for Halloween in 2012

[elfs]

Radical Homosexual Pirates invade Tampa:

When the young men are sufficiently intoxicated, homosexuals dressed as pirates whisk them away to God knows where to take advantage of them sexually. There are even countless stories of any number of immoral sex act being performed by open homosexuals - some even in broad daylight during the event. Pro-family citizens and churches in Tampa are horrified and unfortunately VASTLY outnumbered and overwhelmed by the popularity of the event. One mother complained her three year old had witnessed a man performing oral sex on a Jack Sparrow look alike in her front yard. As long as the Radical Homosexuals run free in our streets, they will continue to spread their debauchery and corrupt our culture.

-- Eugene Delgaudio, Loudoun County Board of Supervisors, Florida Virigina.

[Edited for clarification.]

Comments

[amindofiron.livejournal.com]

there has to be a way to lure these pirates to the pac-northwest. perhaps with some sort of shiny booty....

[alienor77310.livejournal.com]

I was going to offer my front yard in rural southwestern France...

[marketeer]

Although the pirates are invading Florida, the idiot county supervisor is in Loudon County, Virginia, the county next to the one I live in. I guess he's afraid that they're heading north.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Edited and commented, thanks.

[marketeer]

I'm just depressed that that kind of stupidity is so close to where I live; northern Virginia is supposed to be more liberal than the rest of the state.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_candide_/]

Okay, these Fundies are really confused about what "pirate booty" is. And who knows what their dirty-little juvenile minds make of, "swabbing the poop deck."