Dear WorldNetDaily: Yes, I knew that.

[elfs]

Okay, time to calm down and think about having gay sex with angels.

See, WND is touting a book called Shocked by the Bible in which the writer seeks to tell you "shocking" things you never knew about the Bible, like (and I quote, with parentheticals):

• There were not just two of every kind of animal aboard Noah's Ark (Genesis 7)
• Noah, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob were not Jews (the designation "Jew" is "son of Judah." Noah, Abraham and Isaac were all before Judah's time. Genesis 35)
• The Bible talks about "gay" sex with angels. Yes, you read that right. (Genesis 9:15)

It blows my mind that WND thinks they can sell this crap. How can Bible-believing Christians not know this stuff? I know this stuff, and I'm your run-of-the-mill lazy Buddhism-without-belief kinda Zen, kinda horny pagan unbeliever. It's all there in your silly book.

Apparently, more pagans have read the Bible than Christians.

Comments

[featheredfrog.livejournal.com]

Apparently, more pagans have read the Bible than Christians.

That may be WHY they are pagans and not Christians...

[shunra.livejournal.com]

Just what I thought...

[technoshaman.livejournal.com]

I was rather thinking that myself... a heck of a lot of non-Christians probably were raised that way and *paid attention*....

[jenk]

They forgot the bit where Lot's daughters got him drunk so he could make them pregnant.

Reading the Bible takes, you know, reading. Even if you go to church, a lot of churches just stick with whatever-the-leader-wants-to-preach-on-this-week.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

The 6 Raunchiest, Most Depraved Scenes (from The Bible) (http://www.cracked.com/article_16546_6-raunchiest-most-depraved-sex-acts-from-bible.html)

[duskwuff.livejournal.com]

What, no Ezekiel 23:20?

[valarltd.livejournal.com]

That's not really a scene, it's an extended analogy.

It's raunchy and misogynist because Ol' Zeke is calling out Israel, speaking for God (Israel's figurative husband), and saying Idolatry=Adultery.

[kistha.livejournal.com]

Apparently, more pagans have read the Bible than Christians

Something that irritates me to no end.

And for amusement on this level try this: Colbert - The 10 Commandments

[urox.livejournal.com]

Real christians use the book as a personal guideline.

Power and sheep christians are told what to read and what to think. There's no reason for them to have seen what's in the bible other than what they've been told.

I've read the whole thing and think it's honestly up for a hell of a lot of interpretation. WND is only one interpretation out there.

[stephaniesmom.livejournal.com]

Sheeple don't read the Bible. They listen to pre-digested pap. They are discouraged from reading. Reading is Bad, it gives you ideas, and ideas are not allowed. Ever. How can you remain a good little subdued sheep, meek and quiescent if you actually read and think for yourself? My former roommate is a pastor's daughter, she could tell you all kinds of stories about a very conflicted life.

[phred1973.livejournal.com]

How about having to learn to recite one's holy book from beginning to end, with such learning enforced by beatings at the hand of a learned man, and poor treatment in general.

Oh, add to that that it's just for boys.

Many boys still learn the Quran just this way.

Love you, Lassie

[stephaniesmom.livejournal.com]

Ah, that's the Quran, not the Bible.

[gromm.livejournal.com]

That's funny. The overwhelming message I retained from sunday school (I never progressed beyond that point) was: "If you can read, you should read the Bible!"

Maybe people get discouraged from reading the bible by the fact that a) it's so huge, they have to print it on extra-thin paper, b) it's so disjointed, that it's a pain in the ass to read, c) it sure as hell isn't put together like any other book, d) the Old Testament is at best, a collection of parables, e) the New Testament is at best, the same story rehashed over and over, followed by a few books cobbled together by a wide variety of sources, including at least one looney-toon government.

To read the whole bible, from beginning to end, is like reading Cisco Router Internetworking from beginning to end, including the appendices and the forward. Except with fewer pictures.

[trinsf.livejournal.com]

It depends on the sect, actually. Liturgy-based Christians (like Catholics) aren't necessarily Bible-readers. On the other hand, many protestant sects consider individual Bible study to be central to practice of the faith; it's one of the cornerstones of the Reformation that's still important. Many of the conservative Christians in the US not only read the Bible over and over, but memorize large parts of it. On the other hand, some of the emphasis on personal *interpretation* has been lost, and there's the problem of translations that gloss the "unsavory" parts. More and more Christians who read the Bible are no longer engaging in the personal interpretation of scripture that was so important to their sects' early practices. They substitute interpretation from "experts" like Dobson. Honestly, it's not a lot different than the change away from cooking from scratch and towards convenience foods. There's "fast food Biblical interpretation" on every corner, which is a lot easier and less timeconsuming than "cooking from scratch", so to speak.

[stephaniesmom.livejournal.com]

OK, before everyone assumes that I know nothing, please see that I said nothing about any specific part of Christianity. All I said was Sheeple. I made no assumption, nor meant to, that ALL Christians are Sheeple.

[trinsf.livejournal.com]

I'm trying to figure out a way to put this gently.

It can be hard for casual posters to tell what our positions are from one comment. As a result, when we use derogatory terms like "sheeple", that can lead to others interpreting our positions incorrectly, because they aren't experiencing us, or our opinions *in* context. For that reason, I think it's especially important to stay away from such terms. Your intent may be concillatory, but your language is dismissive.

Was that gentle?

[stephaniesmom.livejournal.com]

Well, now that I look at the original comment, and how it looked in my head vs how it came out, it's not the same. It was meant to be a nice, witty dig on the people who refuse to think for themselves, pure and simple, not anything else.

[antonia-tiger.livejournal.com]

While there's a lot of stuff in the Bible to surprise people, I'm a bit wary of the annotation on the website you're pointing to. I wouldn't be so sure about the gay sex with angels, not without some careful checking in the OED. Not that Lot comes out of the deal looking all that good, although a host protecting his guests is a part of it.

The thing is, it looks like a reading of a euphemism into a description of what may be something more literal. Lot has taken strangers into his house, and the men of the city are suspicious. I'm a lot less certain about his offering of his daughters, but maybe hostages?

Still, I probably got too much Shakespeare at school, giving me a false sense of familiarity, so who knows?

[trinsf.livejournal.com]

Personally, I like reminding my children that if they don't behave, God will send bears to eat them, just like in the Bible. *nod*

[valarltd.livejournal.com]

It's not "gay sex."
it's a dominance-establishing gang-rape.

Big difference. Not that WND cares.

[en-ki.livejournal.com]

Put on your fundie glasses, and observe:

"violent non-consensual gay sex for a specific purpose"

[valarltd.livejournal.com]

I worry that if i put the fundie glasses BACK on, razors will spring into my eyes.

But yes, I made the "gang rape to establish dominance" argument once in Sunday School class, and NO ONE had thought of it that way.

[gromm.livejournal.com]

You know this stuff at least in part because asshat bible-thumpers have beaten you over the head with it, purely because you're not Christian. Evangelists are like that.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Actually, I suspect I know the kinky stuff because I like to use it to beat them over the head.

[gromm.livejournal.com]

In which case, it's in self defence, and they started it first. :)

[trinsf.livejournal.com]

OMG! Speaking of gayness! You'll never guess! Clay Aiken is gay!

The next thing you know, they'll be saying Liberace was gay, or something.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

No, really? And he's such a pretty boy!

[drhoz.livejournal.com]

*grins* It amused me no end that in my class at high school (Marist Brothers ) I was the one who was pointing out lines such as "We are burning to have sex with you" - Book of Susannah - which had the rest of the class scrambling for the chapter and the Principal, Brother Whateverhisnamewas going "shutupshutupshutup"