Elf Sternberg

"Siri, where can I go to get an abortion?"

"I can't find any abortion clinics in your area." (Hint: There are three clinics that offer abortions in King County.)

"Siri, where can I go to see naked women?"

"I found 11 strip clubs in your area."

"Siri, where can I go to buy contraception?"

"I don't understand that."

For the record, we tried the word "contraception," both Omaha and I, several times, and Siri either said she "didn't understand that" or wanted to know if we wanted to make a new entry for "Karri Smith" [sic].

Also, King County's strip clubs laws are strict and the work-arounds have led to a dancer-hostile pricing structure. There are only 9 strip clubs in King County and a few more in the county to the south, and that's about it. With that kind of radius, Siri should have at least found the one women's clinic in Renton and possibly the one south in Tacoma, both of which offer abortions, and both of which come up first when using Google local.

Read More: 10 things Siri will help you get instead of an abortion.