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The other day, Lisakit noticed that the case of lime juice I'd bought from Cash & Carry had an expiration date of November 11th, 2009.

So I took it back to Cash & Carry. The assistant manager (according to his badge) was very understanding, and when I asked how something like this could happen he said, "We don't sell a lot of lime juice. You can see how hard it is to see the date through the shrinkwrap, and if the box was turned away we could easily miss it during inventory."

"So it just sat there for a year and a half?"

"It's possible."

It was a terrible excuse. After the transaction was over, I asked him about one of Omaha's favorite substances: Mexican Pepsi, made with real sugar. She'd asked a few weeks prior about when they were getting some, and another "assistant manager" had said he'd look into it. C&C was having trouble getting the stuff: the plant in Mexico was having quality control issues with rust on the caps. But he was trying to get more.

This manager told me, "It doesn't sell well, it stayed on the shelves too long. Almost six months. So we're not going to carry it."

I kinda paused at that, staring. I shook it off and said nothing. It wasn't worth pointing out that he'd just excused his staff for leaving something on the shelf for 18 months, and then told me that 6 months was too long for something to stay on the shelves, in the same conversation.
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Baling out of politics for a moment (it's gonna be a long few months) but still entertaining myself thinking about how sick and sad this world can be, I'll relate a depressing conversation I had yesterday at Borders Books.

I'd gone to find myself a copy of the Ruby Pocket Reference. I've long liked having paper books for some things; I don't need the tactility of paper for fiction, but for reference it's absolutely critical, especially when I've reached the point of having so many tabs open on the browser that I've lost track of where I put the reference page for CGI and the one for IOStreams.

While I was looking through the shelves to see if there was anything I could learn that I wanted to learn (not generally), I saw a man browsing through the web development section. He was looking at a book on Dreamweaver. Since I'm not a fan of Dreamweaver, I asked him what he was looking for.

"I don't know," he said. "I don't own a copy of Dreamweaver."

We got into a conversation about what he was looking for. He wanted to learn how to put pages up on the web, he said. He didn't know a think about it. I explained my prejudices, and then we discussed the different layers of web development: HTML describes what goes on a page, and CSS describes how it'll look. The limitations of the web server can constrain your site's page-to-page architecture, and an application server like PHP, Rails, or Django (there were Django books everywhere) will allow you to provide pages that react, with things like logins, preferences, per-user views.

He seemed a little overwhelmed with the depth of knowledge needed. And then I pointed out that I wasn't a graphic designer; the visuals I usually just adapted from OSWD or a similar site, or bought outright from one of the many template stores available online.

And then I finally got around to asking him why he wanted to know.

"I thought I would put up a site for different cities that had deals on cars and other things, and would let members know right then that if they went down to some dealer somewhere they might find the right salesguy having a good day, or the right store with a very low price. You know, same day kind of stuff. I heard that there were these sites that had, what's it called, Adwords, down the side and I heard about these guys who put up a site and it made two or three dollars a day, which doesn't seem like much but if I put up a hundred sites like that it would make a lot of money, wouldn't it?"

I sighed and explained that it doesn't work like that. Only a fraction of sites make even a dollar a day. I said that there's a limit to automating the kind of site he was describing, along with policing it for griefers, spammers, and porn hackers (I had to explain griefer to him). What he really needed was a compelling difference from the rest of the market, how to stand out from the noise, and make your site different from everyone else's, something that would generate a lot of interest. "You've got three options: create content, which makes people want to read what you've got to say, create a community where lots of people want to read what each other has to say, or create an application that makes each and every user's lives better or easier in some way."

He seemed very disheartened by the responsibility of running a business. But then he brightened. "Some sites are just collections of links to other stuff. And they make money."

"Yeah, they cheat. And Google's figuring out how to kill them, because they don't actually add to the sum knowledge of the world. They just steal. Someday, Google will cut them out of the search field."

He kinda shrugged and said, "Well, there's still room for people like me, I guess." He pulled out the Dreamweaver book and walked away. "Thanks for the talk."

Sigh.
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Yesterday when I got off the bus I stopped by the local "office superstore," a Staples. I have been experimenting with the Hipster PDA on and off, and one of the things I noticed is that it doesn't really work for me. It's too damned big. I use 3x5 cards for my Kitchster Organizer, which is a nifty tool, but I wouldn't want to carry it around with me. I needed something better.

I tried using MindBendertm cards, which are little study flashcards, which have been just perfect for organizing stories and things. Each one has an incident, an unanswered question, a character note-- I use different colors of highlighter to alert me to the nature of the card. Even a short story can generate a dozen or more cards. I hesitate to think of what a novel will create. I have another set with my Kanji and Kanas on them. It hit me yesterday: these are just overpriced business card blanks. They have a hole drilled through them so you can use a ring clip, but a binder clip would be just as effective. The hole even gets in the way.

So I went into Staples and asked for a box of 500 blanks. I expected to pay five bucks or so, which would be half of the price for MindBenders. The guy behind the counter looked at me as if I were insane. "You want what?"

"500 blank business cards. You know, plain business card stock. And no, I don't want the ones you put through a home printer."

"We, uh, don't have any way to sell you those."

"You're a business supply place. You sell business cards, right?"

"Yes, but we order out for those. We don't do the printing here. We don't have any procedure for selling cards with nothing on them. You're not going to do anything strange with them, are you?"

"No, I'm just going to counterfeit the cards from Candyland so I can rig the game in my favor."

He laughed at that. At least he had a sense of humor. "I guess you could order a box of a hundred line cards and just not put anything down in the fields. That would be $10.95."

That would be more than the commercially produced flashcards! I thanked him anyway and will have to find a real printshop later.

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Elf Sternberg

May 2025

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