Wouldn't an eight-track tape have been more appropriate?

[elfs]

As near as I can tell, Ayreon is the name of a studio band assembled ad-hoc by Arjen Lucassen for each of his albums, that he crafts himself along with a long list of rather talented musicians. The albums are studio masterpieces. All of which would be much more interesting if Lucassen wasn't dedicated to singlehandedly keeping the 1980's hair-band genre alive.

I've been listening to his album The Human Equation and it's musically coherent and instrumentally powerful, layered over with utter tripe for lyrics. My goddess it's faux teenage anxiety layered six feet deep: "High school sucks and the rest of life is going to suck just as much!" It's truly ridiculous stuff, reading a bit like some 17-year-old pagan wannabe's journal.

Consider the following exchange, each sung in a different voice, all of which sound like they could have fronted for Ratt, Quiet Riot, or Motley Crue:

[Pride] Be a man, give into hate
[Reason] You better learn to communicate
[Pride] Better to learn to protect yourself
[Reason] That's not the way to get out of this hell
[Passion] Don't rack your brain, let it all go
Savour the moment and feel your blood flow


How silly, all that angst! Still, it must be nice to be old enough and talented enough to have put out ten albums, still be able to fund them, live the life of a rock star. Still, as my subject suggests, there's a better way to preserve 80's rock, and the answer is not to make more of it!

Comments

[solarbird]

I thought 8-tracks were 70s.

[creepingcrud.livejournal.com]

For what it's worth, Ayreon's "Into the Electric Castle" is a marvellously cheesy sci-fi concept album that has a pretty good mix of 70s prog and 80s metal. Not saying it'd necessarily be your cup of tea, but it's got some excellent music on it without the angsting you complain about above.

I'm also rather fond of Lucassen's Star One project, which released an album called "Space Metal" where all the songs are dedicated to sci-fi movies and TV shows.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

But that's exactly my problem with it. It's all so, so, so... cheesy.

[creepingcrud.livejournal.com]

Well, by Great Cthulhu, man, what did you think was going to be on the album?

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Given that I picked it up for a dollar at a second-hand store, I had no idea what to expect.

[creepingcrud.livejournal.com]

Heh. Fair enough, then.

If its presence offends you, you can probably get rid of it on half.com or some such for $8ish and make some profit off your trauma.

[fallenpegasus]

"and take your squirrel to . . . the bagel shop . . . cuz i want a bagel with cream cheese, cheesy cream, creem cheesy cheesy" -- Foamy T Squirrel