Only two days left. Thank the gods.

I was listening to the BBC this evening, and there was a man with a charming Scottish accent interviewing the people of Wyoming. And in interview after interview, the general message the good people of Wyoming gave was, "If Obama becomes president, I will do everything I can to minimize my economic contribution to the country." Not "I will do everything I can to minimize my taxes," but that each and every one of them would, basically, John Galt the country (hey, even Alan Greenspan admits John Galt is dead) without knowing even exactly why. We have only vague ideas what either candidate would do. Obama wants some kind of "Civilian security force" (WTF is he talking about?); McCain regrets that a draft would be politically unpopular, but admits that without it he won't be able to keep his pledge to hunt down Osama Bin Laden. Palin dreams of a Christian America where she can re-impose the fairness doctrine to limit her critics. Joe Biden wants a decent reuben sandwich.

I'm still gonna vote for Obama; the alternative is not acceptable. But expect me to be part of the loyal opposition to each and every contraction of my liberties or expansion of my goverment.

You know what pisses me off the most? That the people who most loudly spout off about the appropriateness of a night-watchmen government are so opposed to our current governmental paradigm that they destroyed the night-watchman function so badly (I'm looking at you, Grover Norquist) that we're left with a choice between Democratic egalitarianism of anticipated competence, and a Republican Great Nation Conservatism so chaotic it makes even baby Stormbringer cry.

Is this really what we've come to? Is night-watchman conservatism impossible, because the people attracted to it are functional anarchists until confronted with social or economic dissolution so terrifying they flip and become socialist autocrats? Are we all really running on corrupt hardware? I'm afraid we are. The very idea contains great novels; unfortunately, it holds no good answers to our nation's ills.

Expanding our government. Restricting our liberties.

So, here's what Obama's section on "National Service" currently reads. He calls it voluntary, but I call it extortionist. Twice: once, when he takes our tax dollars, and again when he requires your participation (along with your indelible membership in Federal identification databases) in whatever structured activities deemed necessary by your government.

Calling this a "brownshirt operation" is simply disengenious. None of this can happen without the consent of Congress, and there's going to be a lot of wrangling, and I'm going to be first to pound on my representative not to pass stuff like this. It will be a violation of our law to have an operation loyal to our President, rather than to our country; worrying out loud about another Reichstag Fire is irresponsible and incompetent fear mongering.

I have no doubt that Obama wants to go down in history as an important and transformative President; I'm equally confident that he wants to go down as a successful president and that, unlike Bush or McCain, he has some kind of clue as to how that's done (hint: more Clinton without blowjobs, less Reagan even without Iran-Contra). This all looks clean and automatic on paper and electrons; I'm curious as to how it will appear after it's travelled through Congress.

My major concern with the below is not that it, as FallenPegasus contends, federalizes all non-profit institutions, but that it de-incentivizes private philanthropy to the point where the philanthropic system, with its evolved set of checks and balances, whithers away. Without competition, that layer of our American infrastructure, vibrant thus far mostly because it's been left alone to weed out its own problems and highlight its own successes, will rot the way welfare did until Clinton helped kick it in the ass.

Expand Corporation for National and Community Service: Obama and Biden will expand AmeriCorps from 75,000 slots today to 250,000 and he will focus this expansion on addressing the great challenges facing the nation. They will establish a Classroom Corps to help teachers and students, with a priority placed on underserved schools; a Health Corps to improve public health outreach; a Clean Energy Corps to conduct weatherization and renewable energy projects; a Veterans Corps to assist veterans at hospitals, nursing homes and homeless shelters; and a Homeland Security Corps to help communities plan, prepare for and respond to emergencies.

Engage Retiring Americans in Service on a Large Scale: Older Americans have a wide range of skills and knowledge to contribute. Obama and Biden will expand and improve programs that connect individuals over the age of 55 to quality volunteer opportunities.

Expand the Peace Corps: Obama and Biden will double the Peace Corps to 16,000 by 2011. They will work with the leaders of other countries to build an international network of overseas volunteers so that Ameri- cans work side-by-side with volunteers from other countries.

Show the World the Best Face of America: Obama and Biden will set up an America's Voice Initiative to send Americans who are fluent speakers of local languages to expand our public diplomacy. They also will extend opportunities for older individuals such as teachers, engineers, and doctors to serve overseas.

Integrate Service into Learning

Expand Service-Learning in Our Nation's Schools: Obama and Biden will set a goal that all middle and high school students do 50 hours of community service a year. They will develop national guidelines for service- learning and will give schools better tools both to develop programs and to document student experience.

Green Job Corps: Obama and Biden will create an energy-focused youth jobs program to provide disadvan- taged youth with service opportunities weatherizing buildings and getting practical experience in fast-growing career fields.

Expand YouthBuild Program: Obama and Biden will expand the YouthBuild program, which gives disadvan- taged young people the chance to complete their high school education, learn valuable skills and build af- fordable housing in their communities. They will grow the program so that 50,000 low-income young people a year a chance to learn construction job skills and complete high school.

Require 100 Hours of Service in College: Obama and Biden will establish a new American Opportunity Tax Credit that worth $4,000 a year in exchange for 100 hours of public service a year.

Promote College Serve-Study: Obama and Biden will ensure that at least 25 percent of College Work-Study funds are used to support public service opportunities instead of jobs in dining halls and libraries.

I'm still gonna vote against John McCain, and help and encourage others to do the same. I'm more opposed to what McCain stands for.

Now to change the subject: Celebrity Sex Tape Re-Enactments.

Not safe for work, but unbearably funny: Members of the Royal Shakespeare Company of London read Celebrity Sex Tape Transcripts, Episode 1: Colin Farrell and Nicole Narain. Omaha and I just about died watching this.

Because we all need to think about something else for a change.

Erotica Writer's Guides And The Act

The most common refrain we hear from erotica writer's guides (and romance writer's guides, at least the ones that deal honestly with the current trend of sexual explicitness found in lots of erotica) is that we must write from the reader's emotions. We must tell a story about what at least one character is feeling, reveal something important about the character or the plot or perhaps even the setting.

But what they do emphasize over and over is that if you're concentrating on the physical things the characters do, you're just writing porn. You're not really writing anything of value.

You and I both know what they're really trying to say: don't neglect the story. Sure. The problem with this approach is that one can go too far with it and completely neglect the other important role of the story: involve the reader. And the one thing I enjoy in an erotica scene, aside from its purpose, is a sense of physical veracity. This over-emphasis on "concentrate on the story" has been over-interpreted to mean "neglect the act."

Human bodies are messy. They're flawed. They're often broken. People have moles and scars and hair in funny places. Among all of the lovers I've had in the past, a sense of chemistry is absolutely essential; some people just smell better than others-- and it's not a quality that person has universally, but a combination, somehow, of my senses and his or her own biochemistry. Different parts smell differently; the armpits, the crotch, the nape of the neck. Some people make a lot of juices, some just a little.

And people weigh something. Either that, or I'm writing a zero-gravity scene again, and that had better have its own awkwardness and messiness. Elbows, knees, what does the character do with that arm he's lying on while in the spoon position?

A writer can get a lot of mileage out of reality. Tell me about the texture of the bed, about the quality of his and her skin, about hair patterns. Fine, long hair gets between the lips during serious kissing. One of my weaknesses I've noticed while writing the Darzi, Peren & Jouet stories is that I have a harder time quantifying Peren because she's a furry, and my willingness to do research doesn't extend to zoophilia. I just have to guess. Maybe this is why I never got all the hoopla over Andrew Greeley's sex scenes in Thy Brother's Wife; they lacked cinema verite. Too many characters in erotica are flawless mannequins, rather than wonderful human beings.