If operating systems were porn starlets!

Sex: Ms. Linux does even less than Ms. Mac. Everything's pretty basic but when she gets it right she's world class. Like Ms. Windows she's prepared to try anything and her tendency to become obsessed with things means that, over time, she normally gets really good.

If you ask her to dress-up she'll laugh at you until your erection subsides. You put up with it because she's the coolest chick you know.

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Stereotypes

This morning when I got into the office I went to the kitchen to put away my lunch and get a cup of coffee (decaf-- bleah!). There I met the head of inside sales and someone I'd never seen before.

He was blonde, about 6'5", and built like Mr. Incredible-- after he started his workout. I mean, he was huge, with the kind of massive chest into which one could stuff a bull's skull, horns and all. He wore a Blackberry PDA on his hip the way some people wear a sidearm. "Hi!" he said in this overpowering voice. "I'm Bob! I'm your new salesguy for Federal Sales."

Of course you are, I thought. I managed to introduce myself and describe what I do. The new guy kept chatting for a few minutes, and the sales manager mentioned some new revision of the product. "Oh, yeah!" says Bob. "Keith mentioned that to me earlier this morning! I ran into him at the gym."

Of course you did. It doesn't matter where I've worked, every guy who worked Federal Sales was more or less built the same way: a handsome human brick who looks like he's ex-Military Police. They seem to come from the same mold or something. When I worked at CompuServe, we had three of these guys.

Pixellation

I took Kouryou-chan to a pizza joint and then over to Kidopolis. It was short notice, but we had just dropped Omaha off at her coven meeting and were on that side of Tukwila. Instead of taking the freeway we drove through Renton hoping to find a traditional pizza place. None were to be found. Desperate, we stopped at a Pizza Hut. Bleah.

While I was in Kidopolis and Kouryou-chan was running around with another pretty girl her age and I was dealing with the girl's anxious-to-talk father, I noticed a video game called Police 911, very high resolution police game, and as I watched someone play it, I saw that the perp's faces were all pixellated.

I think it bothered me because, y'know that whole bit about "faceless criminals?" About how we're not supposed to be bothered if a cop takes a shot at a perp because he's a nobody? In this video game, you're literally shooting at a nobody. Someone with no face, no identity. Completely clothed, you can't even tell the race of the perp.

Really, really weird.