Sean Hannity would have called for the impeachment of George Washington

[elfs]

I was driving around this afternoon, and Sean Hannity was on ranting and raving about how the AIG's report released today "proved" that torture worked and that Cheney was right to authorize it, and it occurred to me that, had he been around at the time, Hannity would have been a Tory first and, once sure that he was on the definitive losing side, would have switched at the first opportunity and then demanded that Washington be declared unfit for office. I can just hear his whiny voice:

Can you imagine. The Hessians bayonetted our brave soldiers at Germantown and Stanwix, and what does our supposed great leader do? He suspends military tradition of field executions and instead gives them food, water, and medicine. He orders an escort of no more than a dozen men, risking their lives, to lead-- or more likely, follow, if they don't get killed-- a hundred Hessians out to Pennsylvania and tells them to wait out the war! Pfagh! Like they'd just leave the war and go start farming or something.

Washington's conduct at the Battle of Trenton shows that he's willing to disregard military traditions and good common sense. He's showing the enemy his weakness and incompetence. The man is not fit to be a general, and he is not fit to be our president.

Oh, and someone get Hannity a copy of the Constitution. He also said that the very first thing in the Constitution was "to provide for the common defense." That's third. The first is "to promote justice."

p.s. Yes, I know there were no Hessians at Stanwix. But to be true to the Hannity form, at least one fact must be wrong.

Comments

[christinaathena.livejournal.com]

I love that. :D

Can I quote this on metaquotes? :D

[elfs.livejournal.com]

You may indeed! Feel free.

[christinaathena.livejournal.com]

http://community.livejournal.com/metaquotes/7228656.html :-)

[count-01.livejournal.com]

You are my new friggin' hero.

[cynonymous.livejournal.com]

Here from metaquotes. Awesome post.

I thought *everyone* knew that song from Schoolhouse Rock: "We the peoplllle, iiiin order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, ensure domestic tranquiliteeee-eeee-iii-eeee, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare aaa-aaand secure the blessings of liberteeeee, to ourselves and our posteriteeeee, do ordaaain and estaaaaaablish this constitutiooooon foooor the United States ooooof Americaaa-aaa."

Sean Hannity clearly never watched Schoolhouse Rock when he was younger, or he would have remembered that. He must be an illegal alien posing as an American citizen. We must alert the media at once!

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but that means I got it wrong. It's "establish justice," not "promote justice." Curses, you have unmasked my alien invasion!

[dornbeast.livejournal.com]

"(Sean Hannity) must be an illegal alien posing as an American citizen. We must alert the media at once!"

I'll find somebody to check out hsi birth certificate. It's probably a fake, and he was actually born in Kenya. :)