Oh, what a wicked, wicked world we live in...

[elfs]

Elbow Grease?

A couple of days ago I was in a Bartells to buy some more antihistamine and dental floss, very exciting. Sharing the aisle with the floss was the "feminine hygiene and contraceptive products," and among the narrow selection of sex lubricants I spotted this little gem: Elbow Grease.

Elbow Grease in Bartells? A drugstore so uptight only dogs can hear it fart is stocking the lube of choice for gay men who don't know any better? Elbow Grease was deliberately created for anal fistfucking and for no other purpose, as you can readily see from the illustration on the package. Gay men who really know better use Crisco, for the simple reason that it's cheap, it's easy to get everywhere, and it works much, much better than any petroleum-based lubricant out there. Sure, it's not condom-safe, but fisting and actual intercourse rarely go together; you're either out to do one or the other, not both, on any given night.

Comments

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Giggle... that reminds me of a cartoon I saw long ago. A young man is sitting on an examination table in a doctor's office, one side of his body massively overdeveloped. The doctor says, "No, Billy, masturbating a hundred times a day won't be bad for your health, but you might want to consider switching arms."