Brains: Giggles, Shrieks, and Horrors!

[elfs]

Al Gore Places Infant Son In Rocket To Escape Dying Planet

"There is nothing left now but to ensure that my infant son does not meet the same fate as the rest of my doomed race," Gore said. "I will send him to a new planet, where he will, I hope, be raised by simple but kindly country folk and grow up to be a hero and protector to his adopted home."

Once I'd figured out how to make men pregnant, I'd turn my attention to obviating sleep

A rather sweet meditation on the benefits and pitfalls of sleep.

Shorter Bob Barr: I need even pagans to vote for me, so I'm sorry about the whole banning Wicca thing.

In 1999, Bob Barr (the Libertarian candidate for president) infamously called for the banning of Wiccan practices on military bases. He now claims it was because the pratices were disruptive, but I don't believe that; if you look at the record, he was just pandering to the Evangelical base.

Comparing Obama to Brintey and Paris: Does the racism charge stick?

I thought McCain's charge that Obama was "a celebrity," (of course he is!) to be silly, but the charges of racism didn't make sense to me. John Riley, though, makes the point: Britney and Paris aren't uppermost celebrities on everyone's mind. The top ten are: Oprah Winfrey, Tiger Woods, Angelina Jolie, Beyonce Knowles, David Beckham, Johnny Depp, Jay-Z, The Police, JK Rowling, Brad Pitt.

A lot of different people, even some brown people. But the McCain campaign chose two vaccuous, sexually availble white women.

Riley adds, "It must have been a coincidence, because we know John McCain wants to run an elevated campaign focusing on the serious issues that America faces."

John McCain wants to remind you of Karl Rove

Some of McCain's former advisers have said that McCain needs to stick to his historic strengths, his maverick, straight-talking approach, which appeals to the political center. Others have urged McCain to charge at Obama head-on. If the race is going to be about Obama, they reason, then Obama must be taken down.

Now the debate has come to an end, and the more aggressive approach has clearly won out.

Let's hope they remind us of what Rove's tactics last brought us.

Pat Boone Sucks Up To Rush Limbaugh

I compare Rush to Paul Revere, the colonial silversmith who rode across the night proclaiming, "The Redcoats are coming!" His loud alarm may have irritated some. (We forget some 30 percent or more of the colonists actually preferred to remain British subjects, not to rock the boat or risk war.) But he and our Founding Fathers had a vision of a free and independent republic - and they pursued it, with everything they had.

I compare Rush to Thomas Paine, the American Revolutionary author who wrote the famous 16-pamphlet series "The American Crisis," which he signed "Common Sense."

(via Dispatches from the Culture Wars)

Comments

[shaterri.livejournal.com]

I think my favorite recent Onion headline has to be 'Mariners move to 8 games over .300'...

[amythis.livejournal.com]

Thomas Paine the Deist radical???

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Yes, as Roosevelt (hey, isn't McCain trying to be the next Roosevelt?) once called him, "a dirty little atheists." Paine was the first man ever to set down into published words the phrase, "The United States of America." What's Limbaugh's legacy? "I have no idea how the vicodin and viagra got into my bags."

[gromm.livejournal.com]

From the looney bin at WND about Rush Limbaugh:

"Thankfully, he hasn't been asked to make a dying proclamation like Nathan Hale – "I regret that I have but one life to give for my country" – but I suspect he would, if it came to that."

Somehow I get the distinct impression that Rush is in fact, a huge pansy, and would avoid the army at all cost, just like all his right wing idols have.

[gromm.livejournal.com]

Plus, after skimming over that article (I didn't have the stomach to read it all) I have to wonder if Pat swallowed afterwards.

[doodlesthegreat.livejournal.com]

As always, it bemuses me that those who are most steadfast against gay rights are the biggest cocksuckers on the planet.

[ionotter.livejournal.com]

My first thought upon seeing that "baby life pod" was, "Wow, that's a neat barbecue!"

It's the little blue flames on the sides, y'see...

[sierra-nevada.livejournal.com]

There's something wrong with my eyesight today. On first read, "obviating sleep" read as "obviating sheep" ...

[clemtaur.livejournal.com]

I read it as "ovulating sheep"

though I like the idea of getting rid of sheep. II don't like them, and I'm sure it's mutual, sheep are mean.