Put Down That Vibrator And Come Out With Your Hands Up!

[elfs]

Dan Ireland, executive director of the Alabama Citizens' Action Program, a Baptist group, said it would oppose any effort to overturn the law.

"Laws are made to protect the public," he said. "Sometimes you have to protect the public against themselves." Ireland said the ban is a "good law" that has bolstered public safety.

"Sexual matters are not to become a nuisance to people and the community," he said. "We have enough problems with sexual-oriented crimes without enticing or promoting it."

Because, y'know, people might hurt themselves with a blow-up doll or something. And we can't begin to count the number of times a dildo has been used in a robbery or assault. (On the other hands, the number of airports evacuated because of a vibrator in the luggage has skyrocketed recently. Maybe Mr. Ireland is just trying to save the TSA any further embarrassment.)

Read it all here.

Comments

Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor, but every once in a while...

[(Anonymous)]

Of course, it's company policy never to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. We have to use the indefinite article: "a dildo", never "your dildo".

[slutdiary.livejournal.com]

What a mouthbreather.

[acelightning.livejournal.com]

[elfs.livejournal.com]

You don't have to tell them the truth, y'know.

[acelightning.livejournal.com]

[gromm.livejournal.com]

That's why I only had to read the headline. :)

Alabama and "no sex toys law" was all I needed to know.

[gromm.livejournal.com]

Yanno, I just realized. They're clearly protecting you from endangering your own immortal soul! What could be more important?

After all, God gave us free will, and the Alabama State Government is there to take it away!

[acelightning.livejournal.com]

[(Anonymous)]

Seems if you click the link to say you're outside the US it bypasses the page asking for info, you don't have to be really living outside the US I imagine even though I personally am.

I agree though they have far bigger problems than a few dildos or vibes about the place. Hell if it would bring world peace there would be people handing them out for free.

[edichka2.livejournal.com]

About 15 years ago I drove across the US in my VW camper.... I remember the sharp contrast between the unruly, tangled swampland bordering the highway in Mississippi, and the perfectly manicured lawns in neighboring Alabama.

And I remember the placard, complete with stars and bars, at a rest stop in the latter state: "ALABAMA -- WE DARE DEFEND OUR RIGHTS." Presumably a state motto or something.

I guess those rights are somewhat narrowly defined.

- Eddie