What's the ribbon of white across your stomach?

[elfs]

It is National White Ribbon Against Pornography Month (N-WRAP-M, I guess), and in honor of antiporn crusaders everywhere I hereby post two new Journal Entries. Well, one really, but it got really big so I split in half like a cheap publisher trying to double his annual title count.

Sting (the rock star) once said that he never finished a song, he just abandoned them. I've twisted and tilted at my Gabrielle story long enough, and I can't find any reason to hold it back anymore. I'm pleased with this story for its proficiency, but since it's been in my archive for more than ten years it has certain political and personal overtones that really don't correspond with my current bents. Still, it's good bad space opera. Enjoy!

Warning, this story is one of those rare ones (in the Journal Entries universe) that includes references to nonconsensual sex, interpersonal violence, and several acts of outright homicide by nominal "good guys."

• The Taking of Gabrielle
• Gabrielle's Rescue

Comments

[jenk]

Jeanine: You wrote short stories.
Marjorie: Those were novels! I just never finished them.
- from Sibling Rivalry

[antonia-tiger.livejournal.com]

Arguably. it didn't need the sex scene.

Formatting: there were a few times when the POV jumps were confusing, looking just like a standard new-paragraph. Things like too people talking and then the next paragraph starts "The door opened", in a completely different place..

Evil thought for a direct sequel: if they can have a robot Pamthreat who can disable a starship, why can't that shuttle arrive at destination carrying a couple of robots? Probably too much of a giveaway if they point sensors at them. But if that shuttlecraft doesn't arrive, what proof is there?

[elfs.livejournal.com]

I fixed the formatting. For some reason, my format engine put blank paragraph breaks instead of scene breaks in that one story. How annoying. Thanks.

Oh, and there is a sequel coming next week. Features one robot. Very nasty.

[fallenpegasus]

I noticed a couple where there is a "hear" when you mean "here", and "sight" when you meant "site". And possibly vice versa.

Fun story!

[(Anonymous)]

You've already posted a sequel, The Kemper Assignment, and it can only currently be accessed from the next: link of Gabrielle's Rescue.
Certainly it's nasty, but it doesn't seem to have anyone playing the obviously-a-robot role. Is your publishing script leaking a pre-release edit?

[(Anonymous)]

I love the way you honor antiporn crusaders :)

Still, her parents had taught her well how to care for herself, and she used the water to its best advantage. She reasoned that if she was to ever escape from this prison, the process was best served by her pleasing her captives until they made a mistake.

You mean captors, right?

[antonia-tiger.livejournal.com]

There are clues, but it's not obvious.

And I suspect we could argue all day over just what really happened at the end.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

My work here is done! (That's the point: Kaffar's nature is meant to be ambiguous.)

[antonia-tiger.livejournal.com]

From context, I would figure that Kaffar is essentially biological. Pendorian nanotech, but nothing obviously different in materials or energy sources. In short. nothing detectable.

I'll hold off on the other angle that occurred to me, except it's a question of uniqueness.

But think of Cheyenne.

[antonia-tiger.livejournal.com]

You know, with all this talk of Pendorian killer robots doing the wet work, I'm reminded of something I scribbled as a teenager. A humanoid robot, looking like a sweet, innocent, schoolgirl, who massed about half a tonne.

When she said she couldn't swim, it wasn't because of lack of knowledge. Here, I probably rewrite hazy memory in a combination of anime and Pirates of the Carinbean: the teacher is getting frantic as she doesn't come up for air, while she walks to the other end of the pool and badly strains the ladder as she gets out.

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Yes, and it's fixed. Thanks!

[elfs.livejournal.com]

Five o'clock and a call to go blading at the skate park down by the mall.
But my mom says I got to prevent hostile aliens from annihilating us all
(HIYA!)

With the strength of a million & seventy men
I guess I really shouldn't complain.
Still, I wish I can go for a walk without rusting in the rain.

It's enough to fry my brain.
So welcome to my life as a teenage robot.
Story of my life as a teenage robot.
My teenage robot life!