Elf Sternberg

I would _not_ dismiss the neighbor child's behaviour as harmless. Intentional cruelty to small animals, despite the common tendancy to dismiss it under the "Boys will be boys" clause, is _not_ a standard part of any child's (male or female) _normal_ psychological development. Children begin to develope real empathy around 18 months old. By the time they're old enough to be running around outside, it should be _well_ developed. He should be aware that other creatures feel pain. Either he is not aware, which is highly unlikely and pretty rare, but possible, or he is aware and does not care or enjoys the fact. There're also cases where a group of children will act as catalysts for such behaviour within their group, each daring the others to greater 'taboo-breaking' activity, but that doesn't sound like the case here, since the child is doing these things at his own instigation for his own enjoyment.

Think about it...I doubt that you, as a boy, tortured small creatures for fun. I know that neither my husband nor my father did so, nor does my son show anything but pity for things that are hurting. In fact, the only men I know who claimed to enjoy hurting things as children were quite creepy as adults, too.

Not sure where I was going with this...just have a pet peeve for seeing deviant behaviour dismissed as 'being a boy'. Boys aren't any more cruel and thoughtless by nature than girls are, and such activities aren't acceptable for them, either. I'd also keep a really close eye out...as has been stated by others, this is a great big red warning flag. This behaviour usually progresses up to things like mice and squirrels, cats and dogs, and sometimes even humans. A lot of times, the person takes up hunting or finds some other socially acceptable ways to express their desire to cause pain and suffering, and just turn into your everyday, ordinary asshole who kicks the dog, spanks the kids, and maybe knocks the wife around a bit, but sometimes they move right on to torturing and killing humans instead. The best thing you could possibly do for the kid is watch him, an the instant he moves up to a small animal, call both the SPCA and your local Child Protective Services...that'd get him in counciling, and maybe he could be helped, and in the meantime, I wouldn't let your girls be alone with the him.

Best wishes,
Velvet