"Busy"

It's curious that one of the people responding to my previous post laid some of the blame for men's poor sexual performance and general lack of pursuit of sexual pleasure on all of us being just a little too busy.

I'm not. I'm never "busy."

I will often say "I'm busy that day," because that's the phrase we've agreed to use, instead of what's really going on. And what's really going on, worded truthfully, would sound brutal and tragic: "I'm sorry, but compared to getting a little downtown / watching Game of Thrones / playing Call of Duty / drinking alone, you're just not a priority."

And that's what I do, on paper, in my calendar, when people ask me for my time. I look back through my calendar and tally up the amount of time I've had with people recently, and the experiences I want and the pleasures I seek and the education I crave and the downtime I need, and I prioritize. Explicitly. I rank encounters and schedules with an eye toward gratitude and pleasure, accomplishment and camaraderie, and then I decide where I'll go each night, what I'll do, and whom I'll do it with.

Maybe I'm not getting as much writing and coding done as I used to, but I'm having a lot more fun.