Steave Deace believes his wife is nothing more than a traditionally acceptable orifice.

Last night, on the drive home from karate class, I made the unfortunate mistake of turning off the ipod (full of show tunes, natch) and turning on Steve Deace, a Catholic-oriented darling rising star of the right, whose tagline reads "Fear God. Tell the Truth. Make Money."

Deace was dissing Michelle Obama-- you know, one half of the First Marriage since Teddy Roosevelt to be both on their first marriage and to have avoided even a whiff of infidelity-- about her praise for Michael Sam, the NFL draft pick who decided to come out of the closet before he was chosen for a team. "This is a woman who says to her children, 'I admire a man who wants to have sex with a waste disposal.'"

That Deace's approach to Sam's sexual orientation comes down to the act of anal sodomy only emphasizes his use and abuse of The Ick Factor. But when Deace writes that way, when he reduces the emotional and romantic universe of same-sex attraction to the mere act of using another human being for getting off, he reduces his own relationship to his wife to nothing more than access to a traditionally accepted hole. I can't help but wonder how she feels about that.