Lenovo: Of all the lame-ass, idiotic, brain-damaged

I received a notice from my OS that the battery in my laptop has been recalled. I checked the serial number and sure enough, it's in the recall list. So I went and checked on the website, and discovered that to confirm the battery is in the recall I have to run a piece of software. The software is Windows-only. Apparently, I can't be trusted to read the serial number for myself.

I then tried calling IBM Customer Support. After going through a whole bunch of hoops, I get to the guy at the support line who tells me that the entire process of battery recall is automated. I tell him that I'm not running Microsoft Windows and I can't run the automated battery detection software, so I can't get to the recall return page.

"Oh," he says. "We don't have anything to help you."

"So, I can't exchange my battery?"

"Everything is through the website. You need to use it."

"I can't. I can't run the program."

"Then I don't know what to tell you, sir."

Well, fuck you, IBM. I have been a loyal Thinkpad user for over a decade, you morons. And now you tell me, "Until you receive your replacement battery-- which you'll never get because you're not a Windows user-- try not to bump or drop your battery. It could be, um, bad."

Update on Lenovo

Well, I called them again. And this time, I didn't take no for an answer. They bumped me up to a supervisor, who said he'd call me back.

He did. And he walked me through the process. It turns out you can hack the URL yourself, if you want, to get to the recall processing page, and put in the 20-digit bar code number printed on the battery, but unless you know the URL, the only place to find it is in Lenovo's stupid program.

He didn't give me the URL, darn it, but he did agree to replace the battery. So, I'm happier. But that first dude, ugh...