No one expects the Homosexual Inquisition!

As if the whole Mark Foley story couldn't get any more surreal.

Earlier this week, Jon Stewart ran with the GOP meme that there's a gay cabal that has infiltrated the network of aides, staffers, and other employees in the Capitol Building and are collecting dirty laundry on congressmen in order to blackmail and humiliate them.

Over on "Accuracy in Media" (which has the tagline "For Fairness, Balance, and Accuracy in Media," and if that doesn't make alarm bells go off, you don't watch much Fox news, do ya?) one of the editors, Cliff Kinkaid, has a hilarious article in which he writes:

At this point in the scandal, the issue is not whether there was a secret gay network, but how big it is. CBS Evening News correspondent Gloria Borger reported the emerging belief that "a group of high-level gay Republican staffers were protecting" Foley. A New York Times story by Mark Leibovich confirmed that gay Republicans have occupied "crucial staff positions" in Congress and "have played decisive roles in passing legislation, running campaigns and advancing careers."

The paranoid article goes on to describe a conspiracy so vast and deep that one needs to wear a tinfoil helmet (or be a Tom Clancy fan) to believe that it could even be possible.

If this article is to be believed, the United States Congress is currently under the thumb of a blackmailing cabal of gay "closet Democrats" who control absolutely everything-- except, as Jon Stewart points out, our government policies against homosexuality.

One benefit I have not got.

I've been going to the gym now for three weeks, and I've been going without a personal trainer, so it's entirely possible I haven't been working as hard as I could. After three weeks, I am starting to see some changes in my arms, my chest, and my abs. There have been other advantages: since starting at the gym I have not had a soda. I'd like to claim that I've given up the 140 empty calories a day, but since I'm doing a protein bar before my workout and eating the same lunch afterward, there really hasn't been that much change. (On the other hand, I'm also not having the pop on days when I don't work out, so maybe that's helping.) I do feel better in a lot of ways.

But I'm not sleeping better. I wish I knew why. I'm still only getting maybe six uncomfortable hours a night, waking every ninety minutes (approximately one sleep cycle for me) and having trouble falling back to sleep. It's really annoying.