Autofisting.

Yesterday, on the drive home, I noticed that one of my headlights was out and the other was preparing to follow it. I stopped at an auto parts store and picked up a pair of new bulbs, pleased to recall that my car, a '97 Ford Escort, comes with pre-aligned lenses that you just plug the simple bulb into.

I pulled out my Chilton's manual and read through the instructions once, completely. I worked on the starboard headlight first. There's a plastic fitting that protects the bulb from rain, and I had to undo it, but the overflow tube from the radiator blocked the way. After removing a guide clip, I had plenty of room and the bulb went in without a problem. I reassembled everything, including the guide clip, and it was good. A quick test showed the light worked fine.

Then I went to the other light. On that environmental protection fitting is a rubber O-ring and this time, as I removed it, the ring fell. Now, this is on the driver's side, where there's a lot less room because the steering mechanism is in the way. The ring fell down into a gap under the power steering box between the light fixture and the wheel well.

I had to shove my hand all the way down, up to the elbow, from the open hood to this tiny opening between the wheel well and the car frame, under all those mechanisms. I was amazed that my arm actually fit down there. At the tip, at just the wrong position, was the ring. I fumbled with it until I got it hooked between the second and third fingers, then pulled back. I had scratches all along the underside of my forearm. It hurt a bit, but I had gotten the ring. The rest of the operation was a success.

Yes, I know, it looks strange.

I'm playing with the style sheets and layers stuff on LJ. I want to put in all of the recent things that are cool about LJ, like recent titles, permalinks, and a list of links thing. It'll take a while. I'll put all the pink girly stuff back eventually.

Yay! The Onion Gets Shrill!

"These documents reconfirm what they told us the first time we saw them," [vice-presidential nominee John] Edwards said while stumping for Kerry in Ohio. "Namely, that our president was seriously negligent during the three and a half years he was supposed to be serving his country."

Read: Documents Reveal Gaps in Bush's Service As President

Wall Street Journal Reporter Farnaz Fassihi is also very shrill. She's in Bagdahd, and she says that if she were allowed to put into the WSJ what she really wanted to say, she'd say that we've lost.

For those of you who aren't yet suffering from outrage fatigue, then may I suggest The Ancient and Heremetic Order of the Shrill, a "cthonian and argute" website where the bloggers track all of the conservative and libertarian intellectuals who have jumped off Bush's ship, or at the very least donned lifejackets. It's a fabulous site. Today's twilight-zone episode: Bush himself was momentarily shrill. But The Order determined he was merely confused again.

Is it just me, or does the twilight zone get even deeper when Bush, who has enough trouble with Abu Gharaib going on already, suggested of his daughters (warning: very tasteless link!), "I'm trying to keep a leash on them" ?

Aaaaiiii! Aaaaiiii! Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Elf Sternberg R'lyeh wagn'nagl fhtagn! Aaaaiiiiii!!!!