Orbit #38 ends.

So, on Friday past I completed by 38th journey around the sun without much in the way of disruption. I picked up Yamaarashi-chan from her home and then drove into downtown to pick up Peter G., who was in town for WinHEC. Then we headed home, where for my birthday I chose to find the nearest non-chain self-described steak house.

( Are there no good steak houses anymore? )

( Saturday: Getting ready. )

( A nice birthday party. )

( Sunday: Mother's Day and I'm at work. )

( Good Samaritans suck. Sometimes )

( Better Joys )

By the time we got home, it was bedtime for everyone. I cleaned up a little and made new Japanese language CDs for lessons 23-26. I finished Lesson 22 on Friday; I'm all caught up! Yay! I can now say things like "Your wife is too fat, right?" And then I headed off to bed.

Phat Words, News

Okay, if you're a geek who takes care of yourself and knows how to dress, is there a word for that? There is now: technosexual. A man who is not only in touch with his feminine side, but is "connected to it on many platforms," a man who both looks good and "has a gigabyte in his pocket."

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Meanwhile, beware the dreaded new addiction of the millenium, food. "I compare the propensity to eat as somewhere between the propensity to breathe and the propensity to have sex. It's much worse than stopping smoking." Especially if you go cold turkey. Whoops, did I mention turkey? Sandwich anyone?

Okay, take this in context and ask yourself this question: Is it really a bad thing that for the first time in human history, even the poorest people have too much to eat? Forget the scare tactics, the article says something profoundly important: food production and distribution now exceeds the human population.

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Okay, now I've heard everything. First, the abuse of prisoners in Iraq was caused by the Farelly Brothers, makers of such tasteful fare as Dumb and Dumber and Something about Mary. The idea was that Americans had gotten used to crudity and dirty humor, and so the soldiers were just acting out what they had seen.

Then, it was my fault, or rather, pornography's fault, and since I write smut I must share in the blame, right? Actually, it's Hugh Hefner's fault, but the author insists that the "few bad soldiers" are really reflecting America's true moral sensibilities. (Someone clue this fellow in that sexual degradation is a common component of all torturous regimes, okay?)

Then Rush Limbaugh gets into the act and says that there's really no harm here, it's just soldiers having a good time. Yeah, Rush, just go take your pills and shut up, okay?

So now comes Men's News Daily with an explanation even more bizarre than the mere concept that the torturers were inspired by Farellian bad taste: they were gay. There's even a wiff of Vast Homosexual Conspiracy Theory here; the Defense Department knew and was investigating the abuse, but the pictures "must have been leaked to CBS by someone."

I must be on the wrong planet.