The Oath of Allegiance

I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state or sovereignty, of whom or which I have heretofore been a subject or citizen; that I will support and defend the Constitution and laws of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I will bear arms on behalf of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform noncombatant service in the armed forces of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me God.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is the Oath of the Allegiance to the United States, as recited by every person seeking to become a citizen of the United States. Or at least, it was.

According to a draft from the Bureau of Citizenship and Immigration Services, the oath has been rewritten. Next year it will read:

Solemnly, freely, and without mental reservation, I hereby renounce under oath all allegiance to any foreign state. My fidelity and allegiance from this day forward is to the United States of America. I pledge to support, honor, and be loyal to the United States, its Constitution, and its laws. Where and if lawfully required, I further commit myself to defend the Constitution and laws of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic, either by military, noncombatant, or civilian service. This I do solemnly swear, so help me God.

"Where it is lawfully required... ?" Isn't it always lawfully required that we defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic?

As for the music, dude, I am having such a flashback.

Must share.

Ernest Cline is a slam poet from Arizona who has some of the best slam that I've heard in a long time. Although his most popular piece is "When I Was a Kid," true geeks know him through two other pieces: Airwolf, a great rant about a great television show, and the much more on-topic Nerd Porn Auteur, which is all about what this country needs: earnest pornographers who dig chicks in glasses "who will make love for hours and hours and begs you to stop only because, baby, she doesn't want to miss Battlestar Galactica."

For another giggle, please enjoy a boot to the head.