Elf Sternberg

Perhaps, in a way, this is true. Some people start flirting from the cradle - I'm told I was flirting before I could speak, and I know the brother most like me was, as well. Other people pick it up during school, after members of the appropriate sex suddenly become interesting in 'that way'. They pick it up, however, by watching other people around them flirting and then trying it out themselves.

*nods* I think that's very much true. My parents tell stories about how they caught me flirting with someone when I was all of 10 days old, so I know the inclination is natural for me, although many of my methods of flirtation are learned behaviors. I think it's likely that, just as some people seem to have natural math or athletic abilities, which makes learning those skills seem effortless and fun to the point of joy, some people have natural flirtation abilities. This doesn't mean that other people can't learn and enjoy and become quite skillful, it just means that they have to consciously apply thought and time and energy to the learning. Someone who is a "natural" has to do the same thing in order to become really good at it, but if they don't want to be bothered they can usually get by pretty easily on their natural ability.

Elf, it's also possible that going to a boys' school did help you learn to flirt .... with other boys. Boys flirt very differently than girls do--I've found that I don't always notice if a girl is flirting with me, either. It's that whole "lesbian sheep" thing, I suspect--a friend of mine took a college course where the professor ended up talking about how it's easy to tell that there are homosexual rams, because they exhibit specific mating behaviors toward each other. He was asked about lesbian sheep, and he said that it's impossible to tell if there are lesbian sheep, because the typical mating behavior for a female sheep to indicate readiness and interest ... is to stand around doing nothing. There does seem to be a bit of a corollary to the behavior of some bi women that I've observed.